“Aunt Ellie, do you know who I am?” “Oh grandma, this is not a fork.” “Come on dad, now it’s time for brain training.” Sentences like this patter to Thousands of people with dementia people. They may be well – intentioned, for the individuals Concerned, they can be a torment. “With such remarks, you no longer know pointed out, what you can do anything,” says Eva Leistra, coordinator of dementia services for the Malteser emergency services in the diocese of Münster. Ill should be queried nor on the errors pointed out. “Constantly his deficits conveyed to get the mag but none like that.”
In order to preserve their Pride and their Dignity, they tried to Demented with all his might, to hide losses, explains Markus Proske, for many years, dementia Advisor. Control questions and corrections thwarted these efforts. Of course, you were not meant to be evil. “Often, uncertainty is simply: What is he or she still can?” The attempt to help the increasingly Forgetful, with brain training on the jumps, is certainly well-intentioned. Anyone have contact to people with Dementia, whether a member, friend or caregiver, should but one to internalize: “It makes no sense to want the Affected in a world of their own back. They respect him, they accompany him in his world.”
Cell loss in the brain
Around 1.7 million people in Germany have, according to estimates of the German Alzheimer’s society, dementia, over two-thirds of them Alzheimer’s. Over 300,000 new cases there are per year, more than 800 a day. By 2050, it is expected because of the increasing life expectancy of around three million dementia patients in Germany. So far, with massive cell loss in the brain associated disease is incurable.
“Dementia is a process,” stresses Becker. “In the initial phase of each Affected does not reflect that something is wrong.” He was then already in an emotional state of emergency, full of shame, despair. “And then he is queried as a child, or corrected,” says Proske. “This is often very humiliating.” So what to do when the grandma shows the fork and says: “Give me the spoon”? Experts such as Proske and Leistra rates, the intended subject of hand, without commenting on the error.
A dementia is behaving more aggressive than before of the disease, location of the – rare special shapes apart – often at the insensitive dealing with him. A classic example is the accusation that you have not reported the whole of last week even, was Leistra explained. “If you talk to the dementia patients, because they have got off the phone with him yesterday, which may end in an evil strife.” Better it is to Dodge it, for example, with a sentence such as: “Oh, Mama, did you miss me?”, and to take the Concerned, loving in the Arm. Behind the alleged accusation, only the vague feeling, to be lonely and to be rarely called to put maybe.
“Escalations in many situations to avoid,” says Christa Matter the Director of Alzheimer-Gesellschaft Berlin. She cites a typical example: A daughter is visiting her ill mother, the your with incorrectly buttoned blouse full of coffee stains the door. The first reaction in such situations is often: “Oh, mom, how do you see that?” The atmosphere was being poisoned right from the start. “Beautiful would be to say: ‘Oh, Mama, you to dress extra chic blouse.’ You can really button but later.”
For a lot of the annoyance also of the accusation, to be from the Partner or child burgled, the concern is often a Matter explained. Ill forget within a very short time, where you lie down on things and would often suspicious, because they could only explain with a theft, keys or money are not to be found. It is not necessary to take such accusations personally, to maintain patience and Composure, so exhausting, the constant Search for things to be.
Shoes in the fridge
Proske says: “We need to make it clear: Everything that a demented person does has a deeper reason.” If not for us, for him, he was entirely conclusive. Keys, wallet or shoes would be deposited, for example, like in the fridge. The would be perceived as a closet, like any other, and contained also something important: the food. “He is equipped with light – how handy.”
And if the grandma is no longer used suddenly partout the bathroom and get in the pants starts, it can have a mundane cause: “people with dementia can often recognize in the mirror. They then think that another Person is in the bathroom,” says Proske. You were ashamed of before the supposed Stranger. Even in nursing homes that will not often recognized – as well as the fact that those with Dementia prefer light running. “Dark areas are perceived as a threat, as a potential hole, and avoided,” the dementia adviser. “Some of the architect belongs tarred and feathered.”